Do any of these sound like you?

• I really want to apply for the promotion at work, but I just don’t think I have what it takes.
• During yesterday’s meeting, I wanted to speak up, but I was afraid of being criticized.
• Last year, my boss approached me with what would have been a huge opportunity, but I declined because I doubted my abilities.
• People often tell me I could do so much more, but I guess I’m my own worst enemy. If I had more faith in myself, I know I could do big things, too.
• I’ve always wanted to [insert goal here!], but my own negative self-talk keeps holding me back.

What do each of the examples above have in common? In every instance, a lack of confidence is preventing you from embracing the inner leader who is just waiting to shine.

If you think that you have to be a certain type of person to be confident, consider the following statement made by author Erika Casriel in a Psychology Today article:

“THE REALITY IS THAT MOST SOCIALLY CONFIDENT PEOPLE DELIBERATELY LEARN SPECIFIC SKILLS, LIKE DISPLAYING BODY LANGUAGE, UNDERSTANDING THE PREDICTABLE FORMAT OF CONVERSATIONS WITH NEW PEOPLE, AND FOCUSING ON THE TOPIC RATHER THAN ON HOW ONE IS BEING PERCEIVED.”
-Erika Casriel

Women & Confidence: A Multifaceted Issue

Deborah L. Jacobs says in a Forbes.com article that despite widespread recent attention on the subject of women and confidence, many prominent authors fail to delve into how women’s “relentless focus” on appearance coupled with an unavoidable failure to attain the standards of beauty that surround us “erodes confidence, increases self-doubt and consumes our energies.”

Author Tara Mohr explains in a NY Times article that a new study found that managers (whether male or female) gave female employees more negative feedback than they gave male employees.

Moreover, 76% of the negative feedback women received included some sort of personality criticism. In contrast, just 2% of men’s critical reviews included negative personality comments.

Criticism of women reaches far beyond the office, as Mohr notes. Female politicians and public figures are often criticized about their weight or appearance, and in today’s Internet-centered world, criticisms often turn downright profane, sexualized and hateful.

The Foundation of Self-Confidence

Not surprisingly, many women around the globe – from secretaries to CEOs – struggle with confidence. If there were a magic wand that could sweep away feelings of insecurity and replace them with a dazzling dose of confidence dust, women everywhere would scramble to get their hands on it!

In the real world, self-confidence starts with you. If you want to alter your self-perception, you have to start by changing your thoughts – and that’s exactly what I’m going to be talking about in my next blog post. Stay tuned, because I’ll help you jumpstart your confidence levels with five easy, customizable affirmations.

Massachusetts Conference for Women Announcement

While we’re on the topic of confidence, I’m so excited to be attending – and participating as an exhibitor – at the 10th Annual Massachusetts Conference for Women on December 4th in Boston!

The Massachusetts Conference for Women provides connection, motivation, networking, inspiration and skill building for thousands of women each year. This year’s featured speaker is Hillary Rodham Clinton, and keynotes include Tory Burch, Ann M. Fudge, and Anne Finucane.

Do you want to finally break away from the limiting thoughts that have kept you from advancing in your career? Apply for a Bolder Moves Discovery Session. Or, contact me via email or by visiting my website, BolderMoves.com, anytime!

Image courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

Colleen

Colleen Slaughter, Proud Executive Coach to the UN World Food Program, the 2020 Nobel Peace Prize Winner

As an Executive Coach for Women in Leadership and Transformational Facilitator, my intention is to help leaders in positions of high influence to understand their worth at a profound level.

Supporting women leaders to truly thrive and step into their greatness, while succeeding in male-dominated industries and spaces is my native genius.

My technique and approach show you how to achieve incredible career success without compromising any part of who you are and what makes you magnificent.

Gratitude. It’s not just a feel-good thing. It’s a powerful life builder.

University of California, Davis, Psychology professor Robert Emmons is a leading expert on the topic of gratitude. He compiled years of research on the subject and published a best-selling book, “Thanks! How The New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier”.

Emmons’ research discovered that people who see life as a gift and acquire an “attitude of gratitude” experience many advantages. Practicing gratitude can improve your health (emotionally and physically) and even enhance relationships.

“Without gratitude, life can be lonely, depressing and impoverished. Gratitude enriches human life. It elevates, energizes, inspires and transforms. People are moved, opened and humbled through expressions of gratitude.”

–Robert Emmons

A Culture of Gratitude

From sports teams to the work place, gratitude is vital.

Research on gratitude and appreciation demonstrates that when employees feel valued they:

• Report higher job satisfaction
• Are willing to work longer hours or otherwise “go the extra mile”
• Engage in productive relationships with co-workers and supervisors
• Feel motivated to do their best, and work towards achieving the company’s goals

Even Google, often known as “the place to work”, values employees and provides a work environment that encourages employee input and personal growth, routinely rewarding and recognizing performance.

CEO Larry Page stated, “My job as a leader is to make sure everybody in the company has great opportunities, and that they feel they’re having a meaningful impact and are contributing to the good of society.”

But what happens when an employee doesn’t feel valued?

A recent study of over 1,700 employees by the American Psychological Association (APA) found that over half of all employees planned to seek different employment because they felt underappreciated and undervalued.

Gratitude on the Home Front

In our personal lives, researchers have found that gratitude can have profound effects – it can even lower blood pressure and increase levels of positive emotions. Often, the more grateful people feel, the less depressed they are.

In studying marriages, Dr. John Gottman from the University of Washington claims that he can predict with 90% accuracy after observing a married couple for only three minutes which ones will flourish…and which will stumble.

His formula for a marriage to last? For every negative (like a complaint or criticism) there needs to be about five positives (compliments, laughter, etc).

Simple Ways to Incorporate Gratitude into Your Life

• Don’t wait for significant events to give thanks. Give thanks for simple things in life – a morning sunrise…a kind store clerk…a pet’s companionship…a good neighbor…even your morning cup of coffee! The list is endless!
• Each day make it a point to show gratitude for something new. Don’t look to yesterday to highlight what makes you thankful – find something new today! Was a work project was completed on time? Did you receive a thoughtful email from a friend? Did a co-worker go above and beyond to help you?
• Try a gratitude journal. If you’re not big on writing, try jotting down on a slip of paper something that you are grateful for. Be specific! Instead of writing down “I’m grateful for my family”, note something special that was done, like “My mom picked up my son from school today to save me a stop.”

You’ll find that the more you acknowledge the good, your world changes!

Gratitude: The Foundation of Success

Expressing gratitude has worked for me, and I know it can work for you, too. Here’s what happened to me when I expressed gratitude to a former mentor…

A couple of years ago, I thanked a former mentor for providing the knowledge, inspiration and encouragement I needed to really make an impact in the life of a particularly challenging client I had. I sent the thank you “for fun and for free” – without any strings attached.

A week later, that same mentor called to ask me if I was interested in working for her. This offer was huge given that I had only thought it would be possible to work with her in a 5-year time-frame. My reaching out to her to express my appreciation (even though I had absolutely no expectation behind it) paid off big time.

I began working with her and pursuing my dream of working internationally again in 1/3 the time I had intended! When you choose to focus on the goodness in life, as I did in the example above, you attract more of that into your experience.

Although practicing gratitude sounds like a simple thing to do, it’s often overlooked. Yet it’s one of most powerful ways to strengthen your inner self…and enhance your outer world. When you find something good and give thanks for it, other good things seem to naturally appear!

Do you want to learn more about how gratitude can redefine your life and help you accomplish things you never thought possible? Apply for a Bolder Moves Discovery Session. Or, contact me via email or by visiting my website, BolderMoves.com, anytime!

Image courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

Colleen

Colleen Slaughter, Proud Executive Coach to the UN World Food Program, the 2020 Nobel Peace Prize Winner

As an Executive Coach for Women in Leadership and Transformational Facilitator, my intention is to help leaders in positions of high influence to understand their worth at a profound level.

Supporting women leaders to truly thrive and step into their greatness, while succeeding in male-dominated industries and spaces is my native genius.

My technique and approach show you how to achieve incredible career success without compromising any part of who you are and what makes you magnificent.

This October, I was honored to appear on Lisa Sasevich’s Success Panel as part of the Ultimate Sales Boot Camp in San Diego. Of 60 applicants, only six were chosen to share their stories on Lisa’s Sales Authenticity and Success Panel, and I was among them!

For those of you who aren’t familiar with Lisa, she’s known as “The Queen of Sales Conversion” – teaching experts who are making a difference how to get their message out and enjoy massive results.

Below I’m sharing some highlights of the story I told the audience – I hope it will motivate you to make your next bold move!

Early Bold Moves

Making bold moves is not new for me. As some of you may know, I grew up in a single-parent household in Kentucky. At 21, I made my first big, bold move when I journeyed to live in Paris – yes, Paris, France. At the time, I had no clear plan for earning money and a very limited fluency in the language. Ultimately, I stayed in France for 13 years and built a successful life there.

When I eventually returned to the States, I was still used to the international lifestyle I enjoyed for more than a decade. I was in a place where I didn’t feel “fed”, internationally speaking.

Around this time, I felt a calling to become a mom – so I put my career on the back burner. In 2011, I welcomed my first beautiful daughter, and officially became a “present” mom, something I value deeply.

When I started to feel a strong urge to return to my work, I felt conflicted because I thought that being successful in business meant being absent from my children.

Through a series of events, I believe the Universe showed me that it was, in fact, very possible to be successful in business and to be a successful, present mom to my girls.

What I’ve Learned

Working with Lisa represents a culmination of many different tools. One of the biggest changes I experienced surrounds the concept of abundance.

I grew up believing I was a “have-not”, and I always worked to prove myself differently. Being part of this mastermind has shown me the importance of believing in my own abundance and what I’m capable of.

As importantly, I also trust the abundance and generosity of the Universe and the way the Universe shows up through other people. When you allow yourself to believe in abundance, you will be amazed at the results you get.

If I Knew Then…

Lisa asked each of us a very important question – “If only you knew then what you know now, what would you share?”

My answer is simple: Believe in yourself and trust the Universe. Don’t wait to get help – we all need help in some way so that we can grow and transform into the women we were meant to be.

I’ve been able to truly answer my calling, transforming from a more “general” leadership coach to focusing on coaching emerging women leaders. I like to say this experience has been like the “yellow brick road” for me – just do the work, and you WILL see big results.

Your Turn!

What’s your answer to the “then-and-now” question? If you knew then what you know now, what would you most want to share with others?

Colleen

Colleen Slaughter, Proud Executive Coach to the UN World Food Program, the 2020 Nobel Peace Prize Winner

As an Executive Coach for Women in Leadership and Transformational Facilitator, my intention is to help leaders in positions of high influence to understand their worth at a profound level.

Supporting women leaders to truly thrive and step into their greatness, while succeeding in male-dominated industries and spaces is my native genius.

My technique and approach show you how to achieve incredible career success without compromising any part of who you are and what makes you magnificent.