Female Disruptors: Colleen Slaughter of Authentic Leadership International On The Three Things You Need To Shake Up Your Industry

As a part of our series about women who are shaking things up in their industry, we had the pleasure of interviewing Colleen Slaughter.

Colleen is an award-winning leadership advisor, professional speaker, writer, and entrepreneur. Her specialty is empowering intentional, values-focused leaders and top teams to shift their limiting beliefs and self-doubt into tangible, inspired action toward their vision and measurable bottom-line results.

She has worked with over 150 intact teams and 500 individual leaders across many sectors and geographies and has racked up over 1600 executive coaching hours. She has helped these leaders, their teams, and those they influence to increase their long-term productivity, impact and fulfillment and, in so doing, make the world a better place as well.

I’ve always been fascinated with human development and entrepreneurship. From delving into self-help books as early as twelve years’ old to embarking on my own personal development journey in my twenties, becoming the best version of myself seems to have always been part of my DNA. Building my own “brand” has gone right alongside that.

Over twenty years ago, I had a front row seat in the Price Waterhouse /Coopers & Lybrand merger and my imagination was captivated by how humans were being dealt with during such a huge transition. I had many ideas of how to do things differently — but seemingly little credibility, as a “mere” secretary at the time. So, I decided to raise my credibility by getting an MBA at one of France’s best business schools.

As an aside, the fact that I had been a secretary while applying to such a school was nearly unheard of in France. To do so meant jumping levels, to say the least! But that’s also part of my DNA: trusting my intuition’s guidance even when it might seem far-fetched. My own success with trusting what I cannot see is why listening to oneself is a big part pf what I encourage the leaders and teams I work with to do. This is one of my trademarks.

After HEC Paris, I began working as a change management consultant with a boutique firm in Paris. This is where I first heard about professional coaching and immediately knew it was for me when my entire body lit up at the mere mention of it. I had found my purpose!

But, even so, it would take me a few years to make the necessary career change toward what I am here to do. At that point, I was back in the US and at a crossroad in my career. Desperate and uncomfortable enough, I did my research and identified the best coaching school for me (Newfield Network) because it offered a wholistic approach to us human coaches and included a focus on messages received from our bodies.

Yet, even then, I still wasn’t convinced I would embrace coaching as a full-on career. My plan at that time was to complete the curriculum and then to re-enter corporate life as an HR Business Partner. But, once again, midway through that training, my body lit up and I knew that I was too in-love with coaching for it to be just a mere feather in my hat: it was to be the whole hat!

Starting my own coaching business was indeed the ticket. The dots began instantly connecting for me: having my own leadership development practice would perfectly combine my two professional loves: human development and entrepreneurship (my MBA major).

Eventually, I also began facilitating transformation and deepening my skills in that area thanks to Gita Bellin’s loving instruction and inspiration from her and the many other world-renowned coaches and facilitators I have been blessed to work with and learn from.

Given my own journey, helping women leaders, in particular, to succeed has been a natural fit: I want to give back what I have received and pay it forward so other women leaders can benefit from my learnings and experience. Now I am building my global practice based on that intention.

Can you tell our readers what it is about the work you’re doing that’s disruptive?

It’s both the work I’m doing and the way I am doing it (aka my personality) that is disruptive to many people.

Leadership advisory isn’t necessarily, in itself, disruptive. After all, a lot of the coaching & consulting out there proves to be quite transactional: focusing on the replacement of a behavior with another behavior, which is not sustainably helpful. It’s like setting a New Year’s resolution: even with all the good will in the world to change our behavior for the better (ever seen a gym in January?), that new behavior tends to not stick unless we get to the root of why we behave the way we do. That’s probably why the gyms are empty by March! Lol.

That’s also why I love truly disrupting people’s behavior by first disrupting their mindsets. Without doing so, no real change can take place. Before all else, I help clients dig deeper to understand and shift their limiting beliefs into ones infinitely more helpful for them and the visions they aspire to create. This thorough process guarantees that those individuals and teams working with me will truly own those leadership traits — and realities — they want and deserve.

This is how leaders can learn to have an easier time having courageous conversations, advocating for themselves, building and nurturing a collaborative, impactful team, etc. In short, they have a easier time being the filler versions of themselves. And, as they role model this new way of being and doing, others get inspired to do the same. How can it get more positively disruptive than that?

Perhaps it’s thanks to my strongly intuitive, courageous, and spunky nature I feel comfortable creating such disruption. Indeed, I see it as part of my purpose to be a force for good in the world.

It’s true, after all, that I am known to name the elephant in the room (always with my clients’ permission, though!) and to continue reminding my dear clients of the version of themselves they say they want to become — even when they’d rather languish in their comfort zones.

My ability to do this for others is probably helped by my doing it with myself all the time.

Some of the bigger examples of my own disruptions with myself are:

• Being a Kentuckian from a low income, single-parent household and taking off for Paris with little money in my pocket, no job lined up, and never having even traveled abroad. This even though had never lived in an international city before. It’s important to note here that I succeeded in making this international experience work: having lived in France for over 20 years now and having a global business based here.
• As mentioned above, as “just” a secretary, applying — and getting into — HEC Paris.
• Researching and composing my master’s thesis on Adult Daughters of Alcoholics in the workplace (as part of the INSEAD EMC) which can be accessed here (bottom of page).. Even using the word “alcoholic” in the business world is probably a shocker for some people. But the fact that I take a stand and bring this research to light — the first of its kind ever in the business world, at least as far as I could find — speaks to how fearless I am in when it comes to benevolent disruption.

I resurface these examples often so that any person reading them can also release any limiting thoughts they might have about themselves or others. We can create any reality we put our heart, mind, and soul to. The only real limitations are our own thinking. Shifting those means shifting what’s possible for us. It also means making the world a better place as the world gets better each time one of us gets even more honest about who we truly are.

Overall, I am a proud Rebel with a Good Cause. I don’t hesitate to go against the grain when the right-thing-to-do dictates a course of action which might be different — and usually is! –from that of the crowd. But I believe I am here to remind people of who we really are — made out of love and higher-level values. Because when we own who we truly are, we show up for ourselves and other very differently, better. This is how the world improves.

And, as Travis Manion said, if I’m not the one to speak up about this stuff, then who will?

Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

The funniest mistake I made when I was first starting out was in taking myself way too seriously.

Yes, of course, taking my role seriously is a must to showing up with the excellence for which I strive. But showing up to my clients and colleagues with stiffness is a surefire way for those exchanges to themselves be stiff — the opposite desired effect. My childhood stinking thinking is at the root of my drive for perfection. The idea being that flawlessness was the only way to be good enough: bollocks! Showing up authentically and vulnerably has many more optimal and far-reaching results when it comes to connecting with others.

To help me learn to lighten up more, my mentor coach during my coaching studies at Newfield Network gave me the homework of conducting coaching calls while upside down on my couch (head where my bottom would normally go and feet off the back side where my head normally is). This was before Zoom or Teams and so I could be in such a strange position while on the phone where no one else could see me. And thank goodness! Could you imagine how my coaches would have taken it to see me upside down like that? Hilarious! It was a great task to give me, too. Throughout the coaching, I knew I looked silly and so would frequently smile. I’m sure my coachees could feel the lighter energy. In any case, I certainly did!

Yet, even with that experience, it still took me a whole to shake the “stiffness syndrome.” Years later, at a facilitator development workshop with colleagues I deeply respect, I found myself yet again seriously trying to be perfect. That is, until a mentor said to me, “You know, Colleen, we’re just having a little fun here.” Those words finally did it for me: from that point on, I set a strong intention to shift to greater lightness in the throes of my work and gradually succeeded.

Today, I receive a lot of feedback thanking me for creating safety through my depth and vulnerability and also for making seemingly vague concepts more accessible through — drumroll please — playfulness!

We all need a little help along the journey. Who have been some of your mentors? Can you share a story about how they made an impact?

Yes, my career — and life — have been transformed by my personal and facilitator development work with Gita Bellin (https://gitabellin.com//) and other wonderful teachers like Lisa Doig (https://www.corpevolution.com/). On the professional plane, they are both world-renowned facilitators of transformation — transforming the lives of thousands throughout the world. But I have to say, I was not always such a willing student of theirs: when I first met both, my recalcitrant ego was definitely in charge, and I put blocks to my learning in place. Luckily for me (and, hopefully, those I’ve been able to subsequently help), the part of me that wanted growth won out. That means I could let both women who “live the work.” play an integral part in my own evolution. For these pioneering women leaders don’t just talk about the importance of living our purpose and exuding radiance — they live their lives in that way. A deep inner journey is rarely easy for any of us. Yet, I have always felt inspired, held, and purposeful as I continue the steps forward toward my own actualization. I would not have had half the impact I do today were it not for these women’s guidance. Thanks to this and the unconditional love for all humans they emanate, I will always be grateful to them.

In today’s parlance, being disruptive is usually a positive adjective. But is disrupting always good? When do we say the converse, that a system or structure has ‘withstood the test of time’? Can you articulate to our readers when disrupting an industry is positive, and when disrupting an industry is ‘not so positive’? Can you share some examples of what you mean?

Yes, unfortunately, there are indeed examples of negative disruption. Whether disruption is positive or negative all comes down to the level of values driving it.

According to Richard Barrette, Founder of Barrett Values Center, values are the “energetic drivers of our aspirations and intentions.” They are therefore at the heart of why we do what we do.

Therefore, with lower-level values which are usually based on the fear that “me, me, me” won’t get what I want or will lose something I already have, we can be pretty sure that the disruption is not a benevolent one. It can’t be because selfish interests — like greed, ignorance and just plain meanness — are driving it, A great example of this is the presidential candidate which just got re-elected in the US. Few people (if any) can find higher level values like compassion, fairness, wisdom and inclusion within that administration’s platform. For this reason and with so much fear driving it, we can expect many sad outcomes to that sort of disruption.

Luckily, on the other side of fear, there is love. Any disruption based on that — even when it might be uncomfortable, which is the hallmark of any kind of transformation — is benevolent and will therefore have positive consequences. A great example of a positive disruptor is Jacinda Ardern, former Prime Minister of New Zealand. Under her leadership, the COVID 21 death toll was limited to two, anti-gun laws immediately took hold right after the 2019 Christ church attacks, and New Zealand took a larger step toward zero-carbon emissions. Ardern’s disruption was for the greater good — both present and future. The higher-level values to which she clearly held ensure that her policy outcomes are and will be positive.

In short, whether disruption is good or bad begins and ends with whether love or fear is at its root.

Real leadership — and the good kind of disruption — is about choosing the collective over individual interests. It begins with choosing to live higher-level values regardless of the threats in front of us. That’s how we can be sure our disruptive efforts will have the best outcomes for the world.

Can you share 3 of the best words of advice you’ve gotten along your journey? Please give a story or example for each.

1. Take exquisite care of yourself. There seems to be a false idea running around — and one I used to subscribe to, too — that we don’t have time for self-care or that taking that time would mean we’re not working hard (and therefore deserving of professional success). What a load of malarkey that one is! It’s not that we can do an even better job despite taking care of ourselves, it’s thanks to taking exquisite care of ourselves that our careers can thrive even more. We are, after all, running the marathons of our lives and careers here. To try to run them at the pace of a sprint and without the necessary water breaks is just a set-up for disaster. We need — and deserve — nurturance. What’s more, it’s that sense of greater wholeness that fuels us to show up even more powerfully and inspirationally.
2. Align with your Purpose. When I first started my business, it was all about “me, me, me, me” (how many clients could I lure in, how much money could I make, etc.). Not only was trying to be whatever any of you wanted me to be so that you would like/validate me an incredibly painful process (for me and anyone I affected), but it also resulted in a fledging business. It wasn’t until I aligned with my purpose, with what I am here to do that I could experience the flow, fun and freedom that truly serving others can be. Aligning with our purpose is how we lead from the inside-out, the most powerful and sustainable form of leading. So, the more I can do that for myself, the more I can also support others in doing the same, thereby strengthening their own impact.
3. Surround yourself with inspiring people. We need other people who are ahead of us to light up the path for us. None of us has eyes in the back of our heads. None of us can stay on top of everything all the time — regardless of how well-meaning or capable we are. I am known to be a Visionary and, still, I need people to help me shed stinking thinking, to dream even bigger, and to put the steps in place to making my Vision become a reality (or to give me a reality check! lol). The larger the number of great people we surround ourselves with, the better the chances our personal and professional lives will thrive. As with most everything, I can’t give what I don’t have, so making sure myself to surround myself with inspirational people is one of my top go-to’s.

We are sure you aren’t done. How are you going to shake things up next?

Indeed, I am far from done: the Rebel with a Good Cause in me will always live on! Lol.

What will I do next, though? As I, too, keep going through my own transformation sloughing off layers of old beliefs (I can’t give what I don’t have, after all!), I will keep tightening my message which I will express in bigger and bigger ways. Short-term, you will see me publishing my first book, putting out more videos, speaking from more stages — maybe even a Ted Talk! — and just generally having a bigger voice. Or, more precisely, letting my message be heard in a bigger way. As uncomfortable as it has been for this introvert (me) to become more visible, I know this is the only way to help as many people as I can.

Medium-to-longer term, it will be what I have just said amplified to even more books, talks, stages and, hopefully, people touched by my words.

In short, I will keep being the ever evolving me.

In your opinion, what are the biggest challenges faced by ‘women disruptors’ that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts?

The biggest challenge faced by women disruptors that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts is the notorious double-standard which does exist. And annoyingly so.

In other words, if we are assertive, we might get labeled aggressive while our male counterparts tend to be able to get away with either approach. And if we say little, then we might appear “small” while our male colleagues are merely “reflective.”

It’s as though we cannot win in the eyes of much of society, our male colleagues, and even of other women.

To counter that, a lot of us have learned to disavow our natural leadership qualities in favor of those we see our male colleagues possessing. Chief among the talents we subdue is our intuition, arguably the most impactful leadership trait to have.

This is something I work with a lot of women executives to re-claim.

In one poignant instance a top leader (who is now Senior Vice President) of a plastics giant, reported that because she had pressured herself to be more like the men (as she observed them) around her, she refused to listen to her intuition and ended up hiring the wrong candidate. His credentials had looked better on paper, even though the other candidate had “felt” better to her. Within days, she regretted her decision: the logically correct choice proved to be a disappointing one. She knew she — and the company — would have been better served if she had just trusted herself form the beginning.

The foregoing is a good example of what I see most often among women leaders: denying our own strengths in order to “blend in” more with the guys, We try to be like “them” and then wonder why we might be less impactful or fulfilled than we know we can be, Only once we grasp the notion that the key is not to become more like them, it’s to become more and more us do we become truly powerful in our leadership and lives.

Do you have a book/podcast/talk that’s had a deep impact on your thinking? Can you share a story with us?

While I am always recommending books, articles, Ted Talks and the like to my clients, there’s one talk I’ve heard recently that has been a game changer for me:

Marisa Peer’s Crash Course for Phenomenal Success: https://youtu.be/lw3NyUMLh7Y?si=iVBbWq5QL23qAyk6

As a Leadership Advisor and advocate for all people evolving into the best version for themselves, I have always been on the path of developing myself and of encouraging the same in others. In fact, I firmly believe that the better the human we become, the better the leader we also become. For it’s at that point that we become ready to live and lead from higher level values. We lead from the inside-out, disregarding other people’s viewpoints and staying true to our own Truth. This is what makes us truly powerful and inspiring leaders, ones who are of the highest service to the world. And I love helping people to get there!

Yet, I also know that helping people to get there starts with me: I can’t help people arrive at the place of leading from the inside-out unless I, too, am doing the same. I can’t help people get to the place of stepping to the side of their egos for the good of the world until I, too am doing the same.

Marisa Peer’s talk above helps me do that.

How? Because the instant I hear myself say — and mean — “I am enough” my nervous system relaxes, and I notice that all the grasping I have been doing trying to get attention here or attention there vanishes. For when I am already “enough,” the struggle is unnecessary. I can just be me. And as it turns out, that IS enough.

From such a peaceful place, I can better help others to also realize their own greatness, just as they are. This lighter-ness makes it a lot easier for all of us to shine in our own special ways — freed from the burden on nonsense thinking.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂

I already have started a movement! As mentioned above, it’s to normalize being the Adult Child of an Alcoholic. After all, it’s a topic few talk about today — and yet 25% of the world’s population is affected. Just as (thank goodness) today the transgender subject is spoken of regularly while twenty years ago it was never mentioned, it is my intention to help de-shame adult children of alcoholics (and their alcoholic parent(s)).The more we bring our darkness (those things we think we have to hide, but don’t) into the light, the more we can find solutions and a like-minded community who can help us to grow. That’s why I chose this subject for my recent master’s thesis (as part of the INSEAD EMC) which, again, can be accessed here (bottom of page). Through this work, I show how the Self-Beliefs of Adult Daughters of Alcoholics at Work can be shifted for the better and how such a transformation can inspire others.

In this way, I hope to become the Sia and Alanis Morissette (music industry disruptors) of the business world!

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

My all-time favorite quote is Maya Angelou’s-

“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Why has this idea been so important to me and my life? Well, because as a strongly intuitive empath, I tend to see what’s up in people and situations rather rapidly. And because I also have that courageous Rebel side to me, I used to say — verbally or through my body language — exactly what I thought. I had a very limited filter. As a result, I sadly saw many people step further away from me.

Confused and hurt and only seeing my good intention, I hadn’t yet understood that there are indeed consequences to my behavior. People were only reacting to the coldness they heard in my tone, not to my true intention there.

Yet when I started focusing on the wake my presence was leaving behind, that tide started to turn for me. Once I learned how to better convey the genuine care (for people’s wellbeing, the best solution possible, etc.) I feel toward humanity and the world, more people began being drawn to me. To be clear, it’s not that I need to be the center of attention. It’s that it’s my purpose to inspire people to step into the best versions of themselves. But when my mannerism (which I learned earl on) inadvertently pushes people away, it’s very hard for me to do that,

Maya Angelou’s quote helps me to focus on the experience people have with me. By doing so, I have been able to shift my body language and choice of words to create greater safety and warmth for all people. Like this I get to influence and inspire more people.

And it’s been a wonderful bonus that I like being with me more, too. 🙂

How can our readers follow you online?

Thank you for asking! I would love to connect you on:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/colleenslaughter/

My newsletter, “Bolder Move of the Week”: https://www.boldermoves.com/weekly-bolder-moves/

Would love to hear from all of you how this article resonated with you.

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for joining us!

My pleasure! I hope my words can help others. Always happy to be in this kind of conversation 🙂.

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for joining us!

About the Interviewer: Dina Aletras boasts over 20 years of expertise in the corporate media industry. She possesses an in-depth understanding of growth, strategy, and leadership, having held significant roles at some of the UK’s largest media organizations. At Reach PLC, the UK’s largest tabloid publisher, she served in various director capacities. Additionally, she held leadership roles at The Independent Magazine Group and DMGT. Her extensive knowledge spans editorial, digital, revenue, sales, and advertising.

Upon relocating to Switzerland, Dina took on the responsibility of managing and promoting the international section of Corriere del Ticino — CdT.ch pioneering the English page “onthespot.” She also was the Co-Editor of Southern Switzerland’s first official Italian and English bilingual magazine.