role models

Women in Leadership: How to Transform the Long, Bumpy Side Road into a Smooth & Sleek Highway

“The most powerful leadership tool you have is your own personal example”
-John Wooden

Jacinda Ardern, Kamala Harris, MacKenzie Scott, Christine Lagarde, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Mary Barra and Angela Merkel are just a handful of spectacular souls changing the face of leadership. And, as much as their impact – and that of other dynamic women- has been proven and is desired, there is still a large gap in the number of women in leadership today.

Indeed, according to the OECD, less than a quarter of top leadership positions worldwide are occupied by women. This share ranges from about 16% in Africa to almost 30% in Europe, Latin America and the Caribbean.

While various reasons exist for this disparity, there is hope.  One way we can bridge the disconnect is through mentoring and positive role modeling.

 

For companies to get the talent they need in the fields where they need it, women (who make up half the population) will have to play a substantive role. And right now, they are not.
Sandra Sancier-Sultan and Sandra Scharf | McKinsey & Company

Learning From Life vs Learning from Mentors & Role Models

While we can learn a lot from books and the classroom, even more valuable knowledge is gleaned from experiencing life itself. And in business, what better way than to learn than alongside a mentor?

Mentors and role models can be a boost not only for business education, but they can also share the emotional and psychological burdens of boardroom atmospheres that often can often feel intimidating and overwhelming for emerging women leaders.

In fact, of the hundred or so top women leaders I have coached, their biggest obstacle has been taking up space in a male-dominated company or industry. In other words, feeling isolated and alone, they are challenged with stepping fully into their power and in so doing having a strong – and approachable – presence.

This male majority has been a phenomenon in nearly every organization I have worked with (and there have been quite a few!). Given this, the more we women can come together and lift each other up, the more we can see those numbers above rise.  Shared experience can be a strong bond.

“My role model didn’t tell me, he showed me.”
-Anonymous

The (Leadership) Elephant in the Boardroom

Lack of equality with men in top corporate positions has been a topic that has received a great deal of attention in recent decades, yet the issue still persists around the globe.

Perhaps it’s the elephant in the boardroom. Outside of their domain, companies profess to a commitment to hire more women, including women of Color. But when it comes to actual hiring, women still lag behind men.

While women’s presence at all levels of the corporate ladder showed improvement in 2020 says McKinsey, the “broken rung still exists: men are promoted at higher rates as managers over women, causing a lack of progress for women towards more senior positions. Women of Color lag even further behind.

Additionally, as aforementioned, women often experience being the ‘Onlys’ and ‘double Onlys’: in a room: they are the only of their gender or racial identity. That means working under a microscope, under continual scrutiny.

While the corporate workplace is not an even playing field for women, there are ways other women can help.

Social Support Networks Prove Valuable in Women’s Leadership

According to Insead, larger businesses are aware that social support is vital for women to work their best – and promote diversity and inclusion.

Examples of such support networks are:

  • Formal or informal mentoring and sponsorship: the ideas of being aware of our own impact and being there for each other are “advertised” and encouraged
  • Peer support: special interest groups (women in mining, women in tech, etc.)
  • Role models: more and more trailblazers becoming aware that their experiences, mindset and energy can most certainly benefit others

Mentoring programs…

Have been in existence for years, and research highlights evidence that informal mentorship and sponsorship to help women is especially effective.

Role Models…

Are just that- those in under-represented groups see others like themselves succeed. That leads to reassurance that they, too can achieve.  Role modeling becomes even more effective when these admired women leaders also become mentors.

Peer Support…

Provides an atmosphere of accomplishment: professionals who attended a for-women only networking conference were more likely to receive a promotion.

Whether it’s mentoring, peer support, or role modeling, they are all beneficial. Those that were free to choose their own mentor found greater value in it versus those who had no choice in their selection. From a coaching standpoint, this is obvious. Trust and fit are the top factors to any successful relationship – especially one where a person is asking another human for support.  It just wouldn’t work otherwise.  I have experienced coachees walking through some tremendous discomfort towards a way of being and doing that is infinitely more rewarding for them. And they never would have drummed up this courage had they not felt good in our relationship.

Sheryl Sandberg has often credited those who have mentored her along the way, describing one mentor as her ‘champion,’ and sharing that she received opportunities she wouldn’t otherwise have had.

Mentoring programs are a win-win situation for both mentors and mentees.

If there isn’t a formal mentorship program or competent female leader in your company who is a good match, look to the outside. Many trade associations offer mentorship programs. Check out WLMA, the Women’s Leadership and Mentor Alliance.

You may also find someone in a professional or community group.

Also, we at Authentic Leadership International are always delighted to hear from you and to be of service in any way we can.

Business Dictionary has some advice: “Observe your mentor’s behavior closely, especially how she reacts in stressful or difficult situations. It is important to develop your own leadership style but utilizing what you learn from a successful manager to mold your own behavior can be a good starting point.”

“When you see a role model, what you see is a person who has the courage to be who you wish you could be.
Stop wishing and just be.”
-Anonymous

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Kindness, role models

Why Genuine Kindness Separates the Grown-ups from the Children in Leadership

“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

This quote, one of my all-time favorites, sums up the call we all have to be (genuinely) human with each other.  The genuine part means we’re not kind simply out of a sense of obligation – to check off a few metaphorical boxes of what we think is expected.  We’re not kind out of a sense of manipulation, just to get what we want. We’re kind because we genuinely want to be there for another person.  This means we have to let go of our protective armor separating us from others and just be good humans.

A recent Gallup survey revealed a startling statistic: only 45% of employees feel their employer cares about their well-being. That’s less than half.

Nearly two years into a global pandemic, there is no doubt that leaders and employees continue to face challenging times in their work relationships, heightened by the ever-present threats of COVID.

Kindness as a Leadership Strategy?

Back in late 2020, Boris Groysberg and Susan Seligson highlighted the unprecedented trials faced by leaders in a Harvard Business School article. And one influential leadership strategy had seemingly been neglected: kindness.

It is a time to think out of the box, for sure, to solve the complexities the pandemic has brought upon us.

But let’s not forget about each other in the process.
We cannot overlook a basic yet powerful principle that works wonders everywhere: kindness.

We’re all overwhelmed and stressed out – every single one of us, even when some might appear “fine.” Not one person walking this earth is unaffected.

Many of our employees are doubling up on work – not only working from home, but also homeschooling kids and playing caregiver roles to children and parents alike as well. Those with no support network may feel isolated.

Our cherished routines have been upended as the world tries to cope, yearning for some normalcy during a seemingly never-ending pandemic.

In the midst of such trying times, it has never been more important be genuinely kind to each other.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” – Philo

Kindness: A Soothing Balm in Today’s World

In the hectic pace of life, we sometimes overlook the simple – and wonderful – power of kindness.

Why?

Because it is so simple. It’s not something that we can buy. It isn’t something necessarily hard to do. But we do need to be in the mindset to do it. And that often requires a specific intention when we are stressed-out and overwhelmed.

Instead of being caught up in negativity, overlooking the good that is taking place, remember that kindness is a powerful tool.

Harvard Business Review reminds us of the far-reaching benefits of kindness such as:

  • Presenting a win-win to everyone: the Giver and the Receiver. Being acknowledged at work lifts an employee up and helps to lessen burnout and absenteeism.
  • Boosting self-esteem and optimism about circumstances – which can result in a ripple effect of positivity.
  • Deepening the meaning of life. When we’re kind, we’re contributing to someone else, and as a result, how others perceive us is shaped. As such, we are creating meaning for ourselves and others.
  • Raising the vibration of any team or organization where it is present.

A Harvard Business School article aptly titled “Good Leadership is an Act of Kindness,” reminds us that the positive effects of kindness go even further. For example, bosses who are kind may even lengthen their employees lives by lessening their stress, which in turn leads to a healthier heart.

Not to mention that when leaders are genuinely kind, more people will want to do great work for them, creating a virtuous snowball effect.  We all know what it feels like to be part of the opposite phenomenon.

The bottom line: kindness (or lack thereof) can have a tremendous impact on our lives.

Holding Back on Compliments? Witness Its Power.

Kindness is catchy. Once we receive someone’s selfless words or actions, we often suddenly want to do our part to spread it. That’s the beauty of it. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

Consider Stephen Cannon, president and CEO of Mercedes-Benz USA, who realized success was much more than just vehicles.

Success was about caring – about everyone. “Every encounter with the brand must be as extraordinary as the machine itself,” said Cannon. With no rule book to follow, Cannon organized a grassroots effort centering on kindness.

It caught on. Random acts of kindness took place:

  • A dealer closed a sale and noticed that it was the customer’s birthday. When the customer came to pick up the car, there was a simultaneous birthday celebration.
  • Another customer had a flat tire on the way to her son’s graduation. She drove into a Mercedes dealership but discovered there were no replacement tires in stock. The service manager jacked up a new car in the showroom, removed the tire, and sent the mom on her way to the graduation.

Harry Hynekamp of Mercedes Benz – who became the first general manager for customer experience – took it further. Realizing that pride in the brand was not as strong as first thought, he knew he had to act when he discovered nearly 70% of front-line employees never even drove one of the cars off the lot.

He changed that by creating a program so that employees could experience the thrill of driving a Mercedes. He put 800 cars in the field, and employees chose their time with the car to correspond with important events in their lives, like weddings or picking up family members.

Reactions were out of this world, Hynekamp said. People had gained a sense of pride in their work.

Taking time to really show we care about others – how they’re feeling, what’s important to them, how their needs can best be met – can transform all of us.

Leaders, Show Your Kindness & Empathy

There’s no secret formula for kindness. There are myriad ways to show it and experience it. Everyone can be kind.

“Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.”
– Teddy Roosevelt

As a leader, get back to the basics of kindness by taking just a few steps:

  • Sincerely ask “Are you okay?” Show a willingness to help, provide comfort, and look for signs of distress.
  • Answer “I hear you.” And when someone talks, really listen. Listen for what their needs might be rather than how you would solve their
  • Seek to understand, “What can we do to help?” Offering a helping hand can make a difference in anyone’s day.
  • Declare, “I’m here for you.” Be there for your employees – with true empathy.
  • Say “thank you”– and mean it.

By the way, it’s probably obvious but nonetheless so important that I’ll say it anyway:  when we’re engaging with anyone, being present is key. Our undivided attention (think: no side glances towards that phone, listening with half an ear, etc.) can, in itself, be an act of kindness. And, often, it’s the presence piece that can be the most challenging.

How About Starting Off the New Year With a Kindness Resolution?

And while it is indeed so important to be kind to others, we must always remember that being kind starts with ourselves.  We can’t give from an empty well.

Here’s an article on the importance of self-compassion and why it matters to every leader.

“A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees.” – Amelia Earhart

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Emotional Intelligence

The Hidden and Sometimes Scary Key to Impactful Leadership…Our Feelings

“To master your emotions is not to suppress them.
It is to process them with diligence and express them with intelligence.”- Kam Taj

In my 15 or so years working with leaders, there is one topic that has stood out as The One to go gently on: Feelings.

Expressing emotions in the business world is (still) oftentimes viewed as useless and inappropriate. After all, people are hired to get the job done, not to feel, right?

And in the case where some feelings, like enthusiasm, passion and inspiration might occasionally be acceptable, any feeling such as sadness, fear or anger indicating an unmet need erroneously seems to signify an irrational, unstable or weak person.

In reality, nothing could be further from the truth: our emotions can play a pivotal role in leadership, even guiding the decision-making process. Think of emotions as a compass that can guide our choices.

Do you believe that disagreeable emotions have no place in leadership? Think again. Consider fear – this instinctual response can alert us to danger…and even help to protect us. Emotions are information about what might be missing for us. That’s powerful, isn’t it?

Enter Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EQ) – is the ability to perceive, manage, express, and understand one’s own emotions as well as others. The benefits of EQ can positively impact everything from everyday workplace productivity to the entire culture of an organization.

In fact, according to Oxford Leadership, developing our emotional intelligence not only makes us better leaders, it can be attributed to:

  • 58% of job performance
  • 90% of top performers
  • an additional $29,000 in compensation annually

Leading With Your Heart or Your Head?

Use Both. A clear example of using emotional intelligence as a strategic tool is revealed in a powerful book, “Leading with Feeling: Nine Strategies of Emotionally Intelligent Leadership,” by Dr. Cary Cherniss and Dr. Cornelia W. Roche.

They cite the story of Tom, a young, successful engineer in a large steel company who suddenly finds himself a manager. At a meeting with a major auto manufacturer firm his firm supplied, Tom was bluntly told he and his team were lousy at just about everything they did.

For Tom, it was like having the rug pulled out from underneath. Now what, he thought?

Instead of immediately reacting, he took the time to listen to their lengthy list of complaints. Then Tom spoke from a place of contained emotions, telling his critics: “I wouldn’t blame you if you fired us as a supplier. But if you give us a chance to fix the problems, I guarantee you that we will not have this kind of meeting next year.”

Tom met with his team, asking for their explanation for the poor performances. He refrained from lashing out, from berating anyone.

Take the Time to Listen

Instead, Tom took the time to understand his team, to ask questions and listen to their answers. He then asked: “What can we do to remedy the problem?”

What was a profound outcome of Tom’s response to the many criticisms thrown his way?

His team had a clear realization that Tom cared.

The next year, at a meeting with the formerly disgruntled company, he heard the best news of his career – they had never witnessed such a turnaround in business in just a year.

How did Tom do it?

He effectively used his emotional intelligence: he perceived and understood his own emotions, how to use them to his benefit and he was able to tap into the emotions of those around him.

To become the best version of ourselves and to achieve the best possible results, every leader can (and should) develop emotional intelligence. This is how we can build teams that believe – and trust – in us.

“It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence, it is not the triumph of heart over head–it is the unique intersection of both.” – David Caruso

What are the Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence?

The School of Life lists 26 ways to determine how emotionally mature we are. Among them are:

  • Understanding the enormous influence of so-called ‘small’ things on mood: bed-times, blood sugar and alcohol levels, degrees of background stress etc.
  • Learning that what is in our head can’t automatically be understood by other people.
  • Realizing that most of the bad behavior of other people really comes down to fear and anxiety.

We know that the most impactful leaders are emotionally intelligent – and people are naturally drawn to them.

They are not impulsive or quick to act and think before they speak, much like the example of Tom, the successful engineer in the example above.

An impulsive, non-emotionally intelligent person finding themselves in a situation like Tom’s would most likely behave in a defensive, blaming manner. Such reactions most often result in undesirable outcomes like tense relationships, information hoarding, and victim stances toward growth.

Increasing Your Emotional Intelligence

Abhi Golhar writes in Inc., stating that statistical data has proven that employees with high levels of emotional intelligence see profound increases in productivity and sales.

Can we learn to be emotionally intelligent? Absolutely.

Some highlights from Golhar’s suggestions:

  • Develop an assertive – not aggressive – style of communication.
  • Mindfully respond instead of reacting to situations.
  • Listen more. (This is a key trait for every leader to develop, read more here…)
  • Cultivate a positive, can-do attitude.
  • Show empathy to those around you. (Here are simple strategies to try in this article.)

Practicing Self-Awareness or Self-Reflection is a Solid Foundation to Developing Emotional Intelligence.

Today, get on the metaphorical balcony to observe your emotions. And, rather than labelling them as “good” or “bad,” see them, as the Center for Nonviolent Communication does, simply as emotions when your needs are satisfied and emotions when your needs are not satisfied.

Understanding the source of your own emotions more deeply, cultivating a knack for appropriately expressing them – and being able to hold the space for others to do the same – is where your leadership genius can take root.

“Leaders must either invest a reasonable amount of time attending to fears and feelings or squander an unreasonable of time trying to manage ineffective and unproductive behavior.” – Brene Brown

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Body Wisdom: An Essential Part Of Great Leadership

Body Wisdom: An Essential Part Of Great Leadership

Have you ever decided to do something—or not do something—based on a “gut feeling?” Your head was giving you facts to lead you in the opposite direction, but you made your choice because it physically “felt” like the right way to proceed—and it was.

This is body wisdom. While we tend to rely on our intellect and even our emotions to make decisions, it’s also important to learn how to listen to what your body is telling you, because it often has the answer that’s in our best interests.

Building Body Awareness

Our body often is the first thing that lets us know if we’re stressed, angry, excited. Our stomach churns, our heart beats faster, we feel “butterflies” in our stomach, we suddenly stand up.

According to the website Leadership That Works, “Our desire for change starts in our body…The world of thought and evaluation is a tiny fraction of the knowledge that is available to us. Paying attention to the body gives us a deeper sense of our innate wisdom.”

The site Wisdom Works says, “While our minds naturally delete, distort, and generalize information to make the complexity of our worlds easier to digest, our body simply tells it like it is. Once we get waylaid by any of the common triggers of stress, our body speaks up loud and clear.”

If you start building an awareness of how your body reacts in different situations, you’re learning how to understand the wisdom it has to offer and then use that when making choices or decisions. You’ll also know when your stress levels are creeping up so you can take steps to avoid a resulting illness.

Body Wisdom And Leadership

The body’s wisdom can be a huge asset in business leadership. Wise leaders are in touch with and able to correctly interpret what their body is telling them regarding any number of decisions and what effect those decisions are having on you as a leader.

“Being ‘body wise’ can help us lead better,” states Wisdom Works. “Our physical being echoes every thought, feeling, and action we take. As a result, information from our body is a trustworthy feedback and guidance system, always at our disposal. When we ignore our bodies’ wisdom, we put ourselves and our teams at risk for poor performance and burnout…”

Effective leaders have learned how to consult their bodies, as well as their hearts and minds, to make decisions that positively impact themselves, their teams, and the world at large.

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Heart-Centered Leadership Traits

Effective Leadership Starts With Your Heart

Endless books and articles have strategies on how to build your business and increase profits through effective leadership. However, current research is proving that more effective, long-term success happens when you lead with your heart.

A People-First Approach

The site Leadership Freak describes heart-centered leadership as difficult but also potentially life-changing for both the leaders and those they manage because it puts people ahead of business outcomes. While a competent leader will expect results, an extraordinary leader asks for those results using a heart-centered approach.

It’s about finding the right balance. “All heart without results is weak. All results without heart is ugly,” says the site.

In a recent Inc.com article, Susan Steinbrecher, CEO of Steinbrecher and Associates, cites a 2012 Towers-Watson study of 50 global companies and their leadership strategies. The companies that focused on a people-first leadership approach and other people-centric business strategies had a one-year operating margin that was three times higher than companies who ignored this strategy.

According to Steinbrecher, “There is strong evidence that these results may be due to the positive impact that a more heart-centered leadership approach has on employee performance.”

Heart-Centered Leadership Traits

Below is a partial list of the qualities found in a heart-centered leader, taken from the Leadership Freak and Inc.com sites. If you see yourself in this list, congratulations! If you don’t, consider trying to work them into your management style. You might be amazed at what happens for you and your team.

Heart-centered leadership means:

  • You care more about values than results.
  • You speak the truth to others, and expect them to so the same with you.
  • Your goal is to serve the people you lead rather than them serving you.
  • You are compassionate, grateful, and a good listener.
  • You’re not afraid to admit your mistakes and ask forgiveness from others.
  • You’re committed to personal and professional growth for both you and your team members.
  • You work hard to build self-esteem in others and help them shine.
  • You assume the good in others, even if their actions indicate otherwise.
  • You consistently touch base with your team for both business and personal conversations.
  • You are dedicated to making a difference in your life, the lives of your team, and society as a whole.

To be an effective leader with a thriving business, plan with your head but lead with your heart.

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