Align with your Purpose first and foremost. Know there is plenty of room in the world for good people doing work. Take excellent care of yourself. Surround yourself with great people. Plant as many seeds as you can and let go of the results.

As a part of our interview series called “Women Of The C-Suite”, we had the pleasure of interviewing Colleen Slaughter.

Colleen is an award-winning transformational facilitator, executive coach, professional speaker, writer, and entrepreneur. Her specialty is empowering intentional, values-focused leaders and top teams to shift their limiting beliefs and self-doubt into tangible, inspired action toward their vision and measurable bottom-line results.

She has worked with over 150 intact teams and 500 individual leaders across many sectors and geographies and has racked up over 1600 executive coaching hours. She has helped these leaders, their teams, and those they influence to increase their long-term productivity, impact and fulfillment.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit more. Can you tell us a bit about your “backstory”? What led you to this particular career path?

I’ve always been fascinated with human development and entrepreneurship. From delving into self-help books as early as twelve years’ old to embarking on my own personal development journey in my twenties, becoming the best version of myself seems to have always been part of my DNA. Building my own “brand” has gone right alongside that.

Over twenty years ago, I had a front row seat in the Price Waterhouse /Coopers & Lybrand merger and my imagination was captivated by how humans were being dealt with during such a huge transition. I had many ideas of how to do things differently — but seemingly little credibility, as a “mere” secretary at the time. So, I decided to raise my credibility by getting an MBA at one of France’s best business schools.

As an aside, the fact that I had been a secretary while applying to such a school was nearly unheard of in France. To do so meant jumping levels, to say the least! But that’s also part of my DNA: trusting my intuition’s guidance even when it might seem far-fetched. My own success with trusting what I cannot see is why listening to oneself is a big part pf what I encourage the leaders and teams I work with to do. This is one of my trademarks.

Finding My Purpose

After HEC Paris, I began working as a change management consultant with a boutique firm in Paris. This is where I first heard about professional coaching and immediately knew it was for me when my entire body lit up at the mere mention of it. I had found my purpose!

But, even so, it would take me a few years to make the necessary career change toward what I am here to do. At that point, I was back in the US and at a crossroad in my career. Desperate and uncomfortable enough, I did my research and identified the best coaching school for me (Newfield Network) because it offered a wholistic approach to us human coaches and included a focus on messages received from our bodies.

Yet, even then, I still wasn’t convinced I would embrace coaching as a full-on career. My plan at that time was to complete the curriculum and then to re-enter corporate life as an HR Business Partner. But, once again, midway through that training, my body lit up and I knew that I was too in-love with coaching for it to be just a mere feather in my hat: it was to be the whole hat!

Starting my own coaching business was indeed the ticket. The dots began instantly connecting for me: having my own leadership development practice would perfectly combine my two professional loves: human development and entrepreneurship (my MBA major).

Eventually, I also began facilitating transformation and deepening my skills in that area thanks to Gita Bellin’s loving instruction and inspiration from her and the many other world-renowned coaches and facilitators I have been blessed to work with and learn from.

Given my own journey, helping women leaders, in particular, to succeed has been a natural fit: I want to give back what I have received and pay it forward so other women leaders can benefit from my learnings and experience. Now I am building my global practice based on that intention.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began leading your company?

Funnily, I have stumbled on this question for quite a while. As there wasn’t just one, isolated interesting story that happened to me. However, upon reflection, I see that there has been a running theme which I find fascinating: the success of my business has directly mirrored my own personal development. In other words, as I answered elsewhere in this article, in the very beginning, when I was more self-serving, what I got was a whole lot of frustration (few clients, few business partners, no enjoyment in what I was doing). Yet the more I have gradually been able to shed bits of my ego (although completely imperfectly as the human I am), the more my business has flowed, and I am having more fun. It’s one of the joys — and challenges — of being a Coach: we really do need to be walking the talk. Being a few steps “ahead” of our clients is not just something we are advised to do, but I also actually love evolving. The more I do it, the better my experience of life gets. And, in this example, I guess it’s also fair to say that the better my business gets, too.

It has been said that our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

Our upsets can indeed be set-ups for learning! The biggest error I made when I was first starting out was in taking myself way too seriously. Yes, of course, taking my role seriously is a must to showing up with the excellence for which I strive. But showing up to my clients and colleagues with stiffness is a surefire way for those exchanges to themselves be stiff — the opposite desired effect. My childhood stinking thinking is at the root of my drive for perfection. The idea being that flawlessness was the only way to be good enough: bollocks! Showing up authentically and vulnerably has many more optimal and far-reaching results when it comes to connecting with others.

To help me learn to lighten up more, my mentor coach during my coaching studies at Newfield Network gave me the homework of conducting coaching calls while upside down on my couch (head where my bottom would normally go and feet off the back side where my head normally is). This was before Zoom or Teams and so I could be in such a strange position while on the phone where no one else could see me. And thank goodness! Could you imagine how my coaches would have taken it to see me upside down like that? Hilarious! It was a great task to give me, too. Throughout the coaching, I knew I looked silly and so would frequently smile. I’m sure my coaches could feel the lighter energy. In any case, I certainly did!

Yet, even with that experience, it still took me a while to shake the “stiffness syndrome.” Years later, at a facilitator development workshop with colleagues I deeply respect, I found myself yet again seriously trying to be perfect. That is, until a mentor said to me, “You know, Colleen, we’re just having a little fun here.” Those words finally did it for me: from that point on, I set a strong intention to shift to greater lightness in the throes of my work and gradually succeeded.

Today, I receive a lot of feedback thanking me for creating safety through my depth and vulnerability yet also for making seemingly vague concepts more accessible through playfulness.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

Yes, as mentioned above, my career — and life — have been transformed by my personal and facilitator development work with Gita Bellin (https://gitabellin.com//) and other wonderful teachers like Lisa Doig (https://www.corpevolution.com/). On the professional plane, they are both world-renowned facilitators of transformation — transforming the lives of thousands throughout the world. Personally, both of these women have played an integral part of my own growth journey because they “live the work.” Meaning that they don’t just talk about the importance of living our purpose and exuding radiance — they live their lives in that way. A deep inner journey is rarely easy for any of us. Yet, I have always felt inspired, held, and purposeful as I continue the steps forward toward my own actualization. I would not have had half the impact I do today were it not for these women’s guidance. Thanks to this and the unconditional love for all humans they emanate, I will always be grateful to them.

Leadership often entails making difficult decisions or hard choices between two apparently good paths. Can you share a story with us about a hard decision or choice you had to make as a leader?

Throughout my life, I have made some daring moves by simply following my gut. Such moves have comprised, for example, moving to Paris from Kentucky with hardly any money and barely speaking French, applying to — and getting into! — a top MBA program while a « mere » secretary, and sticking to my guns to build a thriving leadership advisory despite tumultuous economic conditions and multiple naysayers around me (including, at times, my own voice). By many people’s standards, these moves went against logic. Yet, all the while, they still were the right ones for me to make. The circumstances of my current life (degrees from both HEC and INSEAD, a thriving global business based in France) are proof of that.

I emphasize my trajectory both, yes, to make my point, but also to highlight to anyone who might be in self-doubt to trust your Self (capital “S” on purpose here). Your Self always knows the right way for you.

Anyway, since long ago I learned that trusting my intuition would get me much further than mere reason alone ever would, choice-making has never been difficult for me in my business.

There have been times, however, where even when I knew what the right thing to do was, I resisted doing it. Take business development, for example. As a Leadership Advisor, what I am selling is myself in a sense. (It’s not a product or anything material.) It’s an invitation to go on a journey with me. While I know through many client testimonials that what I am putting out there leads to immeasurable impact for those I get to work with (and those they touch, too), it’s taken time for my own sense of worthiness to catch up.

In other words, many times, I had to work past the “little ole me?” self-protests when I was advised to take more proactive marketing actions. During that leveling-up phase, taking any kind of pro-active business development action was very challenging for me — even though I knew that was the right thing to do. Not only for the health of my business, but also especially for spreading the positive impact I know from feedback our work together can create. So, you see, we Leadership Advisors are human, too: we also have our foibles and challenges.

Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. Most of our readers — in fact, most people — think they have a pretty good idea of what a CEO or executive does. But in just a few words can you explain what an executive does that is different from the responsibilities of the other leaders?

In a few words, the main difference between being an executive and another kind of leader is that executives have so many activities which consistently need our attention that we can very rarely be “off.” Being so could be dangerous to the smooth running of the business. In fact, often, I wish I had the ability to morph into an octopus to handle all the mini emergencies which seem to spontaneously arise. This is not to say that other leaders are not also challenged with multiple responsibilities in various areas. Only that as executives, there is a lot more pressure to ensure that that everything is running smoothly. The buck stops with us every time, after all. Our bottoms are the ones on the line.

What are the “myths” that you would like to dispel about being a CEO or executive? Can you explain what you mean?

There are three main myths I would love to dispel about being a CEO:

1. Being a CEO does not mean we know everything.
2. Being a CEO does not mean we don’t get scared or feel lonely sometimes (because we do)
3. While seemingly glamorous, the CEO’s role of often being in the spotlight can be taxing.

First, occasionally I run across people who are under the impression that because we are leading companies that we have also magically integrated all relevant knowledge in the world. And wouldn’t that be nice if that were true! Instead, while we do indeed love to learn new things, we also acknowledge that there are only so many hours in a day to absorb the full range of information we might need to truly succeed. That’s why you will see most of us surrounded by a great team, filled with people we trust. It’s also why many of use our intuition as our guides in many/all of our choices. We are also usually a courageous lot: taking calculated risks where we might not be sure — at least, initially — of the “best” solution.

Next, just because we may have built or may be running a company does not mean we also do not feel very human emotions such as fear, anger, and loneliness. We are humans, too!

In fact, we are human beings first and foremost, even though the pressures and pace of our world can tempt many of us to try to forget that (and instead try to be human doings). But really, this feeling part is key because so many people — in or out of the organization — might be looking up to us without realizing that we, too, have our issues. And while some top executives may not be too happy with my revealing this reality, I have seen first-hand how much more impactful leaders (especially senior leaders) become when we show our genuine vulnerable side rather than trying to display a false image of perfection. So, a note to all the readers of this article: yes, we leaders have our uncomfortable feelings, too!

Finally, many of us might get an untrue idea that the lives of executives are glamorous. Well, some things — like the travel, the meeting all kinds of people, and the creative freedom to choose our marketing approach, clients we want to serve, etc. — are indeed wonderful. However, needing to have our hands in many different buckets to keep the business running smoothly can get exhausting. And we if we do not put in place and maintain a generous resilience program for ourselves, we, like any other human, can get run down and the business (along with ourselves!) will suffer. Perhaps it’s my unique role as an American (where it seems people live to work) living in Europe (where people are more likely to work to live), but I still find it shocking how unbalanced many of our lives are. All one needs to do is look among our colleagues and friends to see how many people are in burnout, especially since Covid. As with nearly every transformation in the business world, change starts at the top. The better we leaders take care of ourselves, the better our people will follow suit and the better our companies will do. It’s a myth to think otherwise.

In your opinion, what are the biggest challenges faced by women executives that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts?

The biggest challenge faced by women executives that aren’t typically faced by their male counterparts is the notorious double-standard which does exist. And annoyingly so.

In other words, if we are assertive, we might get labeled aggressive while our male counterparts tend to be able to get away with either approach. And if we say little, then we might appear “small” while our male colleagues are merely “reflective.”

It’s as though we cannot win in the eyes of much of society, our male colleagues, and even of other women.

To counter that, a lot of us have learned to disavow our natural leadership qualities in favor of those we see our male colleagues possessing. Chief among the talents we subdue is our intuition, arguably the most impactful leadership trait to have.

This is something I work with a lot of women executives to re-claim.

In one poignant instance a top leader (who is now Senior Vice President) of a plastics giant, reported that because she had pressured herself to be more like the men (as she observed them) around her, she refused to listen to her intuition and ended up hiring the wrong candidate. His credentials had looked better on paper, even though the other candidate had “felt” better to her. Within days, she regretted her decision: the logically correct choice proved to be a disappointing one. She knew she — and the company — would have been better served if she had just trusted herself form the beginning.

The foregoing is a good example of what I see most often among women leaders: denying our own strengths in order to “blend in” more with the guys, We try to be like “them” and then wonder why we might be less impactful or fulfilled than we know we can be, Only once we grasp the notion that the key is not to become more like them, it’s to become more and more us do we become truly powerful in our leadership and lives.

What is the most striking difference between your actual job and how you thought the job would be?

The most striking difference between how the job really is and how I thought the job would be boils down to workload, particularly regarding business development. In other words, the naïve view I had had about this role is that everything would somehow magically flow (I can indeed be naïve at times). What I didn’t bank on is how much work it takes to get that flow to occur. As a business owner, I could literally be at work 24/7 if I do not put some boundaries in place for myself. There is always something to do: from building relationships, to developing new content to updating the website. Really, as CEO, I am responsible for every part of the business. And while I have indeed hired help with certain aspects, this company is still my baby, mine to nurture and develop. Luckily, I love what I do. So, half the time, the work I am doing doesn’t feel like work. Instead, it feels like I am working on a very long-term assignment (which never gets turned in — lol). That having been said, I would not trade in being an entrepreneur for the world: I love the freedom (in multiple areas) and platform for living my purpose it affords me.

Is everyone cut out to be an executive? In your opinion, which specific traits increase the likelihood that a person will be a successful executive and what type of person should avoid aspiring to be an executive? Can you explain what you mean?

The only people who are not cut out to be an executive are those who self-eliminate by their thinking. First, there are those who want no part of such responsibility/pressure. For this lot, we can certainly all agree that they are Happy Campers as things are so it’s all good. Then there unfortunately seems to be those (such as myself, in my early days) who consider themselves “Have-Nots” and falsely believe they could never be good enough to wear an executive’s shoes. But, as Henry Ford said, “Whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right!” The truth is, all we need to do is believe we can do it and set an intention to do so. Then success is only a matter of footwork and time!

That said, yes there are specific traits which would increase the likelihood of becoming a successful executive. Before detailing these traits, however, it seems important to first clarify what I mean by “success.” In a nutshell, success to me means gaining superior results through prioritizing alignment with one’s personal (and team and organizational) values. This is very different from checking boxes, pretending to be something (or someone) we’re not, and saying “yes” when we want/need to say “no.” In other words, a “successful “executive in my book has a strong intention to make the world better through the work they do every day. And through giving attention to their intention, they not only succeed in achieving their vision, but they also significantly improve the culture and therefore the rate of productivity, innovation and resilience of the people comprising the company — generating a better bottom line.

The Executive Traits Attached to Such Success Are:

1. Courage
2. Intention to Serve
3. Resilience

• Courage is the trait forming the bridge between the lower-level values and the higher ones. It’s all too easy to follow the crowd and make the choices that most people make. But it’s actually a strong sense of courage which distinguishes a true leader from the wannabes because a true leader stands for higher-level values and purpose. In today’s crazy world, it takes a lot of courage to stand in one’s truth despite naysayers, critics and pressure to perform. In my people-pleasing days, I’ve certainly been there many times. Thing is, I felt icky afterward: lost and identity-less. Courage is the number one trait we all need to have if this world (and ourselves!) has any chance of regaining more integrity.
• Next, having an intention to serve is where the rubber meets the road in any kind of leadership, and especially that of executives. Such a trait aligns with higher-level values and has humility at its core. When we have an intention to serve others — rather than being the best, for example -we right-size ourselves, become willing to learn and adjust, and truly desire the highest good for all. How could there possibly be an even more relevant trait for a successful CEO?
• Finally, Resilience is essential to staying aligned with our values. We all know how tough life can be and without a focus on our own renewal, it can be more tempting to lose our courage to stay the course through the tougher times. Resilience teaches us that when one door closes, there will always be an open window, even if only slightly. Prioritizing physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual self-care no matter what — especially in our busiest times — is what helps us maintain positivity and a genuine inner drive to create our vision. It’s this optimism and drive which often inspires others to want to follow us and our ideas.

What are your “5 Things You Need To Succeed As A Senior Executive” and why?

1 . Align with your Purpose first and foremost. 

When I first started my business, it was all about “me, me, me, me” (how many clients could I lure in, how much money could I make, etc.). Not only was trying to be whatever any of you wanted me to be so that you would like/validate me an incredibly painful process (for me and anyone I affected), but it also resulted in a fledging business. It wasn’t until I aligned with my purpose, with what I am here to do that I could experience the flow, fun and freedom that truly serving others can be.

2 . Know there is plenty of room in the world for good people doing work.

Recently a good friend who is changing career paths asked me if, given the many, many coaches in the world, I felt threatened by the competition. I surprised both of us when I could honestly answer “not at all.” Given what I answered just above that reality has been a miracle. Indeed, I notice that since I have aligned with my purpose, I truly believe there are some leaders in the world for whom I am the best Advisor possible and that, for others, different Advisors would serve them better. It’s all good. After all, my intention is for as much good as possible to be brought to the world. So, it certainly takes a village — and more than one Coach! — to do that.

3 . Take excellent care of yourself. 

There seems to be a false idea running around — and one I used to subscribe to, too — that we don’t have time for self-care or that taking that time would mean we’re not working hard (and therefore deserving of earning a lot). What a load of malarkey that one is! It’s not that we can do an even better job despite taking care of ourselves, it’s thanks to taking exquisite care of ourselves that our companies thrive. We are, after all, running marathons here. To try to run them at the pace of a sprint and without the necessary water breaks is just a set-up for disaster, Anyway, why make it this far in our careers to not enjoy it?

4 . Surround yourself with great people. 

None of us has eyes in the back of our heads. None of us can stay on top of everything all the time — regardless of how well-meaning or capable we are. I am known to be a Visionary and, still, I need people to help me dream even bigger and others to put in place the steps to making that Vision become a reality (or to give me a reality check! lol). The larger the number of great people we surround ourselves with, the better the chances our businesses will thrive.

5 . Plant as many seeds as you can and let go of the results. 

Multiple times throughout this interview, I’ve mentioned how being an executive means needing to maintain our eye on multiple balls most of the time. While that is indeed true, it’s also true that there no way we can control everything. In that vein, taking care of what’s within our power and letting go of the rest has been a very helpful practice to implement as my workload has increased. It’s not that I don’t care about the seeds I am planting, it’s that I trust that as I am living my purpose through my work, the sun, rain, and nutrients will show up as they will. In the end, this approach has helped me to cultivate a lush crop: those clients who choose to work with me tend to stay long-term and even often become friends.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good for the greatest number of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger.

I already have started a movement! It’s to normalize being the Adult Child of an Alcoholic. After all, it’s a topic no one talks about today — and yet 25% of the world’s population is affected. Just as (thank goodness) today the transgender subject is spoken of regularly while twenty years ago it was never mentioned, it is my intention to help de-shame adult children of alcoholics (and their alcoholic parent(s)).The more we bring our darkness (those things we think we have to hide, but don’t) into the light, the more we can find solutions and a like-minded community who can help us to grow. That’s why I chose this subject for my recent master’s thesis (as part of the INSEAD EMC) which can be accessed here (bottom of page). Through this work, I show how the Self-Beliefs of Adult Daughters of Alcoholics at Work can be shifted for the better and how such a transformation can inspire others.

In this way, I hope to become the Sia and Alanis Morissette of the business world!

We are very blessed that some very prominent names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them.

Yes! There are two types of women leaders whom I would love to meet: those who have shamelessly faced their demons and show others how to do the same and those who share what they have generously.

In the first group, people like Sia and Alanis Morissette, yes (as listed above), and people such as Brene Brown and Glennon Doyle. What I love about trailblazers such as they are is that they have not only seen the gift in the trials that they have endured, but they also have a clear desire to help others overcome similar challenges and put themselves out there so vulnerably to do it. The movement I described in my previous answer and feel called to create aligns perfectly with the work of these brave women.

Next, I would love to meet the amazing women who are generously sharing their fortunes to heal the world. Donors such as Ruth Gottesman, MacKenzie Scott, Melinda Gates, Oprah Winfrey, Dolly Parton, and even Beyonce (!!) are showing everyone what true prosperity is by sharing what they have with others in need.

Not only am I super impressed and humbled by their selflessness, but I also have a longer-term vision of creating a Foundation aimed at helping abused girls get well educated. This is a big part of my “why” which I currently live out in small ways (mentoring women in that category, speaking to groups of them, and founding/running my business with the intention of helping to heal the world). But the actual larger (huge) step up to setting up a Foundation is another story. My intention is to achieve it while I am still here among you.

These names (and others who fit these groups) are clearly my people or, at least, the people I strive to be. They all have stepped to the side of their egos to do what they can to make this world better. And, given the VUCA (volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous) reality most of us are exposed to regularly, such benevolent intentions are like a breath of fresh air. It just can’t get any better than that.

Thank you for these fantastic insights. We greatly appreciate the time you spent on this.

About The Interviewer: Vanessa Morcom is a millennial mom of three and founder of Morcom Media, a performance PR shop for thought leaders. She earned her degree in journalism and worked for Canada’s largest social enterprise. She can be reached at vanessa@morcom.media