Most of us still grin when someone mentions the 1990’s book “Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus.”

Really?

Did we need a book to tell us that?

But it’s not just relationship issues that set the sexes apart. They also differ in how they go about their jobs – and how effectively they’re perceived as leaders.

In August 2014, former Citigroup CFO Sallie Krawcheck suggested in an interview that the 2008 financial crisis might have turned out differently if it were the “Lehman Siblings” instead of the “Lehman Brothers”.

As she pointed out, many people claimed that the crisis wouldn’t have happened if it were the “Lehman Sisters” instead. Her viewpoint, however, asserts that gender diversity is the key to “combatting the kind of groupthink” that has ruled over Wall Street and led to the 2008 crisis.

So, just what do women bring to the table – and what is it that makes them such effective leaders?

Qualities that Make Women Effective Leaders

Leaders are people who normally declare possible what other people do not. This is precisely what makes them leaders.

-Rafael Echeverria, Ph.D.

Frieda Klotz wrote in Forbes that while there are plenty of distasteful stereotypes about female leaders, truth is, it just isn’t so.

German chancellor Angela Merkel came in fourth in Forbes’ list of the most powerful people – well ahead of her European colleague Nicolas Sarkozy. Even Hillary Clinton’s ratings are higher than they’ve ever been.

Communication is one area where women are often thought to outshine their male counterparts. Women also have a different perspective than men and tend to look at problems and possible solutions differently.

Women are also often thought of as empathic – they understand what others are feeling – and that skill greatly enhances effective leadership.

And after the many financial disasters in the US and abroad, long-term thinking came to the forefront as a prized character trait, as did risk awareness and caution, according to Klotz, characteristics very often viewed as “feminine”.

The best teams are not one-sided with all-male or all-female members, but rather a blend of “skills and backgrounds which bring spark and innovation to organizations,” wrote Sylvian Perrins in the Financial Times.

Just How Are Women Leaders Different?

Bob Sherwin, Business Insider contributor and COO of leadership consultancy Zenger Folkman, examined women leaders in a three-part series.

Research revealed the effectiveness of women as leaders appears to change over time. When men and women first start their careers, there is little perceived difference. Then men are seen as slightly more effective. But as women mature, they’re viewed in a progressively more positive light.

The gap between men and women continues to widen until they hit their 60’s, when it starts to narrow. At its height, there is a difference between men and women of 9 percentile points.

When women were questioned about why they might been seen as more effective leaders, the researchers heard frequently, “In order to get the same recognition and rewards, I need to do twice as much, never make a mistake and constantly demonstrate my competence.” In other words – do more, and do it better.

How many women have found themselves doing just that? The findings further revealed women were seen as more effective than men in taking initiative, driving results, and being positive role models.

Interestingly, in male-dominated fields such as engineering, IT and others, women received higher effectiveness ratings. Even as they climb the corporate ladder, the higher they move, the more positively they are perceived.

Industrial and organizational psychologist and leadership consultant Dr. Gordon Curphy co-authored a book, The Rocket Model: Practical Advice for Building High Performing Teams. He writes that while doing research at the Air Force Academy, he discovered women generally make better leaders.

“To me, leadership is all about whether you can build a cohesive, goal-oriented team that gets results. Women do a better job at that than men do,” Curphy commented in an interview.

So, that old saying just might be true, “If you want something done, ask a woman!”

Exciting news! My all-new, groundbreaking online training event, Ladies’ Leadership Secrets, is right around the corner! This FREE event takes place from March 31-April 3 and will be featuring 20+ extraordinarily successful women who are sharing all their leadership secrets to show women everywhere how to rock their lives!

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Remember when your mother told you it’s a man’s world?

As a child, you probably just accepted her perspectives on life.

But now….as an adult…have your viewpoints changed?

If you’re not living the life you’ve always dreamed of…have you wondered what’s holding you back?

Overcoming Ourselves

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg says women need to take more responsibility for their own success. “I’m not blaming women, but there’s an awful lot we can do,” she asserted in a CBS 60 Minutes interview.

But the statistics say women are doing a lot these days, earning:

• 47% of all law degrees
• 48% of all medical degrees
• Over 44% of master’s degrees in business and management

One might assume that because of these statistics, a large portion of women have achieved prominent positions in the workplace.

But something happens when women attempt to achieve higher levels of success. In It’s Not a Glass Ceiling, It’s a Sticky Floor, author Rebecca Shambaugh examines the idea that women are responsible for holding themselves back, intentionally and unintentionally. She writes that the lives of working women are extremely complicated, trying to balance careers with children, families, and other responsibilities.

“The trick to finding your way out is to avoid getting caught up in a sense of crisis (a very sticky floor). Instead, appreciate that you are poised at an opportunity for change…I believe that great leadership is so much about knowing who you are. Successful leaders know their strengths, weaknesses, beliefs, motivations and intentions.”

-Rebecca Shambaugh

Time to Be Real

When it comes to figuring out what’s holding so many women back, at least one answer might be straightforward: many women simply don’t trust themselves enough.

“The major barrier stopping women from succeeding in the workplace and in their lives is the lack of trust in their own intelligence, judgments, and abilities. When women permit jealousy, competitiveness, and fear to immobilize their voices, creativity is stifled and the ability to act is thwarted,” says psychologist Dr. Maddy Gerrish.

When a woman trusts herself, the results can be profound: higher levels of self-confidence, a greater sense of empowerment, and of course, more self-esteem.

And how often have we not said something to someone…because we were afraid? This is a big one for women in particular, who are often reluctant to speak up, for fear of stepping on toes, overstepping boundaries, or just potentially creating unwanted conflict.

Gerrish relates the story of one of her students in her “Finding Your Voice” workshop. The woman had a boss who yelled at and humiliated her during staff meetings. One day she decided to take action – when her boss began to berate her, she stood up and left the room. Her boss followed her, they had a one-on-one meeting, the air was cleared – and her student gained self-respect.

And finding your self-respect can be contagious… When the student told her 70-year old mother what she had learned, her mother discovered her self-respect, too – and hung up on a verbally abusive relative’s phone call.

Conquering the Unseen Barriers

In a Harvard Business Review article, authors Herminia Ibarra, Robin Ely and Deborah Kolk write that while many CEOs make gender diversity a high priority, their results are frustrated: “They and their companies spend time, money, and good intentions on efforts to build a more robust pipeline of upwardly mobile women, and then not much happens.”

The problem, the authors note, is that becoming a leader is a true identity shift that involves internalizing a leadership identity and developing a sense of purpose and authenticity. As a woman and a leader, you’ll find that your sense of purpose develops as you define your values – and stay aligned with them – even when the going gets tough.

Is there such a thing as a natural leader? Opinions may vary widely, but the authors of the HBR article suggest that learning to be an effective leader is like any complex skill: it takes (a lot!) of practice and hardly ever comes naturally.

Perhaps the most thought-provoking question is to ask yourself “How much longer am I willing to allow myself to be held back?” Take a lesson from the quote below – and if you find that you’re consistently not living up to the potential you know you have inside – make a BOLD move and change something…you’ll be thankful you did.

‘For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today? And whenever the answer has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

-Steve Jobs

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Do you have a job? Or a career?

Hmmmm. You’re might be thinking that you hate your job anyway, so really, what’s the difference?

Plenty.

A job is something you may have settled for. A career is a choice.

And if you truly desire a job of your choosing, you don’t have to settle!

How a Job Differs from a Career

“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.”

-Steve Jobs

A job is:
• A regular activity performed in exchange for payment.
• A position in which one is currently employed.

A career is:
• A chosen pursuit; a profession or occupation.
• The general course or progression of one’s working life or one’s professional achievements over time.

In short, what makes each term different? Satisfaction. Development. Advancement. PASSION.

How Did We Get So Dissatisfied?

Kathy Carpino, who writes about careers, leadership and women in business, says she meets people every day who are in careers or jobs they hate. When delving into the reasons why people are so dissatisfied with what they do for a living, one is very familiar: “…in the past 30 years, we’ve become slaves to the almighty dollar, addicted to acquiring things we can’t afford, which keeps us working long and hard just to break even.”

There are single parents who work just to make ends meet. Many people take jobs early in their careers and find it difficult to break free a decade or two later. Some students graduate from college expecting to enter the workforce and actually put their degree to use – only it doesn’t always work out that way – and many find jobs in fields totally unrelated to what they ever imagined.

But Carpino says there are other, deeper reasons people feel so unfulfilled in their jobs.  “When people feel completely stuck, they get angry and defensive – like a caged animal.  They experience themselves as victimized and backed into a tight, dark corner.  They just can’t see a way out.  But from my vantage point, there is always a way out; there are always new options and solutions.”

What Makes Us Feel Stuck in our Jobs?

Sunil, in Extra Money Blog, summed it up rather humorously:

“It has been said (and I agree) that most people die at age 35 and just refuse to get buried till they are 85 (or whatever the average life expectancy is today). In other words, people hate their corporate jobs. They can’t stand it, but have no other option than continue to show up to work with the rest of the herd every morning for the rest of their lives. They essentially compromise their lives.”

If you look at the issue more deeply, you’ll find that many people are lacking the structure, clarity, and self-confidence to develop an alignment with their true talents and greatest desires.

Caprino says people just don’t know themselves.  Or, they think they know themselves – but believe they’re wrong.  So, you might be saying things like, “I should be thankful just to have a job” or “I’m wrong to think I need a change”. Women in particular tend to do this.

She also suggests people sometimes lose the courage to act. Sometimes we get comfortable in a situation – even if it isn’t ideal. For instance, you may think that yours is the only job that will keep paying you what you want.

Maybe you’re hanging on to a title you think you’ve worked hard for – and aren’t willing or ready to give up yet. Or, you might feel that your job offers you some other perceived benefit that might not be easily replaced – like a flexible schedule, impressive health benefits…even a close proximity to where you live.

You Can Break Free…Finally!

If you’ve got a transferable skillset, you can bust free, says Chris Pearson at Pearsonified.com. You don’t have to be an expert now to make a career. “If you can even be considered reasonable ‘expert’ in a particular area, then there’s probably more work out there than you alone can handle,” Pearson suggests.

Quitting a corporate job can put things into a whole new perspective.  You may realize new financial savings – gasoline, meals, parking, day care – and a host of other pluses.  If you’re not ready to take a leap and quit your job just yet, you might consider starting your own part-time business on the side.

Whatever you do, don’t let fear take over. It is a huge step to change a long-term job. Stay aligned with your values as you focus on the light at the end of the tunnel – and don’t become paralyzed by your emotions. You can be happy and fulfilled in your work!

Do you want to develop the self-confidence you need to break free from an unfulfilling job? Be sure to sign up for my FREE e-series! Or, contact me via email or by visiting my website, BolderMoves.com, anytime!

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Ahhh…you welcomed a New Year… but that’s all that’s new in your life.

You’re stuck in the “hate my job but can’t afford to leave it” rut.

The joy of the New Year lasted as long as it took the ball to drop in Times Square – and now life is back to the same-old routine.

Perhaps Drew Carey jokingly summed it up for a growing population of unhappy workers: “Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”

Sound familiar?

We laugh at Carey’s comments, but your small inner voice is speaking to you, telling you there is better…you can do better…and most importantly, you want to do better!

Why We Stay in Unrewarding Situations

There are a variety of reasons why women and men alike stay in jobs they hate. Perhaps the most common reason is what the media outlets continually tell us: people are living paycheck to paycheck, simply paying bills. Even some people who have “good” jobs think they cannot afford to quit their corporate job because they have bills to pay!

Business Insider says the 3 top reasons people are dissatisfied with their jobs are:

• Low pay
• Lack of opportunity
• No chance for career advancement

Digging Deeper…

It can be easy to blame the “I hate my job epidemic!” that has swept over society on the three reasons above.

Yet there are more deep-seated issues as to why people feel so seemingly unable to leave a dead-end job in favor of a career of their choosing. And these deep issues may also explain why we feel stuck in other areas of our life – stale relationships, negative situations, and other less-than-ideal circumstances.

In considering the deeper reasons for the high prevalence of people who hate what they do for a living, Kathy Caprino summed it up for her Forbes article: “These reasons touch on underlying emotional, spiritual and behavioral conditions, and reveal a deep disconnection to what it means to live joyfully, authentically, and meaningfully.”

Caprino, who covers careers, leadership and women in business, lists 8 reasons people continue to stay in jobs they hate. Among them:

• Do you put financial rewards over your own happiness?
• Does the thought of actually making that change overwhelm you?
• Have your beliefs been sabotaging you? Do you believe work is actually supposed to be a drag?
• Has the concept of happiness been eluding you? Is it hard to even remember the last day you actually felt fulfilled in your work?
• Are you feeling fearful that others might see you as weak, vulnerable, or flawed?

We can probably identify with each reason on the list, and this is where it becomes important to develop self-awareness. Discovering who you are – becoming authentic – requires a strong commitment to getting to know yourself.

The payoff can be monumental – greater efficiency and effectiveness, enhanced motivation, more balance in life, a feeling of empowerment, and other superior results over a sustained period of time.

Yes, fear can paralyze you – but you can overcome it and move forward. In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, “Do one thing every day that scares you.”

Simple Tips to Find a New Job

• Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Start by pursuing a number of different methods. Online job offers state they can connect your resume with a host of potential employers – but oftentimes companies prescreen, using software that searches for keywords relating to experience, training or education. According to Debra Feldman, an executive job search consultant at JobWhiz, your resume may never even reach someone who could determine your potential value.
•  Put your energy into networking and spend less time submitting resumes online. In US News and Money, an even bigger issue is brought to light: The vast majority of jobs are never advertised.
•  Keep in contact with business contacts who can let you know of an opportunity before it goes public. And if you’re set on working for a particular company, make contact with someone there who you can trust to let you know of a potential opportunity.
•  Do your homework. Read blogs by professionals in your field and glean from their expertise. Think about continuing your education in some way – this can be anything from a brief seminar to a new degree.
•  Promote yourself. Whether that’s becoming active in your community, volunteering, or creating your own website and letting the professional world know of your experience and capabilities.

Better yet, “Almost everyone can be a published author,” Feldman says. And by doing so you’re making potential employers aware of your skill set – and that can be even more powerful that the standard resume.

Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything.
-Napoleon Hill

Do you want to develop the self-confidence you need to break out of the “I hate my job” rut? Be sure to sign up for my FREE e-series! Or, contact me via email or by visiting my website, BolderMoves.com, anytime!

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Have you ever felt like something was missing in your life? Wondered if you felt really satisfied – fulfilled – passionate, even – about your life? Thought about how to finally make that big breakthrough? Who hasn’t?!

How can you actually start making the BOLD moves that will take you to HIGHER levels in your career and in your life? In truth, there is no single, direct path to creating a huge breakthrough in your life, but these tips will give you some pointers as you’re on your journey:

1. Take a trip – outside of your comfort zone. I’m not just talking about travelling somewhere that you’ve never been before (even though that’s a great idea, too!). It’s not just your body that you need to take on a vacation – take your mind with you as well.

Instead of trying to stick with “the way things have always been done”, get out there and explore the world. Watch how your world begins to expand as you open to new ideas and new ways of doing even the most mundane tasks. Explore a new perspective, listen to someone else’s point of view for a change. You might be surprised how much you’ve been missing.

2. Push your boundaries BIG time. Most of us know what that feeling – you know, where you think you’ve gone as far as you possibly can and you just can’t go any farther? That’s exactly when you need to keep going. When you discover a boundary, you’ve established your breakthrough point. Change, real change, only happens when you get uncomfortable. So, shatter your barriers, think big, and take a leap of faith!

3. Make time to take time…for yourself! Everyone needs “me time”, but so many people think of this as being “selfish”. Far from being a practice reserved for society’s most self-centered, “me time” can actually help you come back with more clarity, more focus, and more readiness to rock your world.

When you’re busy all the time, you don’t have time to just “be” – and that makes it about impossible to be open to trying anything new. So, start by taking some dedicated downtime at least once a week to give yourself the space to think creatively, to relax, to enjoy a hobby you’ve been missing out on, to take a stroll in nature…you don’t need to have any specific purpose.

4. Find someone who inspires you. This isn’t about imitating someone else – it’s about being inspired by that person to motivate you in your own journey. Some people are inspired by a close friend or mentor, while others find motivation in someone they’ve never even met before, such as a public figure or celebrity. Learn from what has already been done to make your own life steps firmer, faster, and more innovative.

5. Ditch your old habits. Notice I didn’t say “bad” habits here. Daily life can become pretty habitual. Your habits – good or bad – might well be the shackles that are holding you in bondage to your current situation. Try shaking things up a bit – it might not be easy, but you’ll find yourself a lot closer to your breakthrough BOLD move moment.

“Our character is basically a composite of our habits. Because they are consistent, often unconscious patterns, they constantly, daily, express our character.”

-Stephen Covey

6. Get started – NOW! Many of us let fear stand in the way of a major breakthrough. How many times have you made excuses like the ones below?

When the time is right, I will…

After I do this or accomplish that, I can finally…

I’m just not ready; I need more time.

I was going to do it, but…

Start now – from the place where you are today – and work up from there. Be open to fresh ideas; flex your mental muscles. Instead of quickly saying “no” to a new opportunity…say YES to the possibilities that await you.

Do you want to develop the self-confidence you’ll need to make a BOLD breakthrough this year? Be sure to sign up for my FREE e-series! Or, contact me via email or by visiting my website, BolderMoves.com, anytime!

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